His name was Jonathan

            Today we are holding each baby a little closer.
            This morning as we were working in Kelly's House, Chelsea and Taylor, an intern that we met here, walked into the shelter that we take the kids to watch movies every now and then. They stopped in their tracks when they saw a little white casket laying on a table in the middle of the room. They turned around and came into the room that Hannah and I were in with tears running down their faces and told us that someone had passed away. Immediately Hannah and I went into panic mode and wanted to know answers right away. I felt like I was going to throw up. I wanted to know who it was and how it happened and get all of the answers but I was so in shock that I could not even move. Did we not feed a child properly or give them the right medication yesterday? I wanted to know who it was and why.
              Eventually I get the courage to get up and walk to the shelter. Well, they weren't lying. Laying right in the middle of the room was the tiniest casket that I have ever seen. This is what I was most terrified of seeing while I am here. I stood there, probably three yards from the casket and began to pray. I still did not know who was in the casket or why they were not here on this earth anymore but I prayed. Hannah and Chelsea came over a few minutes later and we all stood there speechless. One of the workers that worked in the kitchen beside the shelter seemed to be very upset. I wanted to pray with her.
                Standing two feet away from the small white casket we got in a tiny circle and laid our hands on the young worker and began to pray. After we prayed, the woman told us that his name was Jonathan. He was 5 years old and was rescued a few months ago. He suffered from malnutrition and a skull injury which he went through two different surgeries for.
                 When we were done talking to the worker we saw that Jonathan's nanny and another older woman were sitting near his casket crying. We made our way over there and laid our hands on both of them and prayed. We made sure they knew that Jonathan was now in heaven with Jesus and that he is not hurting anymore. When the prayer ended we gave each of them a hug and our sincere condolences. As we were walking away I glanced in that tiny little casket and saw the little boy that used to be on this earth with us but that is now in heaven.
               Please keep Jonathan's family in your prayers along with the workers that took care of him.

             

Mi Familia es su familia

               Today was my first day outside of Hope of Life's campus. I went with a group from California to a village to take pictures. As a volunteer, we are asked to do a variety of things and one of them is going out with a group to be a photographer. Since I went to a few different villages last year I pretty much knew what to expect going into it this time. When we drove up to what seemed to be a path that led to a cornfield, which was actually the entrance to the village, there were many children and people waiting for us to get there. The kids were so excited to have us there to play with them! We got off of the bus and greeted the people with smiles and a bunch of holas since we are not very fluent in Spanish.
                The village had a big open space with tall grass and wires everywhere with some makeshift soccer goals. I was not able to play soccer since I was the photographer but I was able to talk to some of the kids that were too shy to play. A young teenage boy had a small parrot on his hand and gestured for me to hold it. He put it on my index finger and the little bird climbed all the way up to my shoulder and sat there for a little while.
              One little girl that I met was named Madelyn and on each hand she had a little brother tenderly holding onto her. Diego was four and Juan was five. Madelyn asked me to take a picture of her so I got the sweetest picture of the three siblings. While I was showing them their picture they curiously grabbed the end of my pony tail and said that my hair was not like theirs and that my skin was white. I explained to them that they are my brothers and sisters through Jesus but I am from a different part of the world so we will not look the same. That led to them calling me their hermana, which means sister in spanish, and I was more than okay with that.
               When it was time for us to leave, Juan grabbed my hand and my little brothers and sister walked me back to the bus and we said our goodbyes.

"For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother."
                                        -Matthew 12:50
                          

               

Send Me

             "I'm not ready to leave Zacapa, Guatemala. I feel like my journey here has just begun and the week was over with the blink of an eye. The experiences that I had here were life changing and I know for a fact that I will be back. Half of my heart is staying here in Guatemala with the beautiful mountains and the beautiful people. These people taught me so much about life. I thank God for bringing me, for opening my eyes to a new outlook on life and breaking my heart for what breaks his. Goodbye for now Guatemala."
              This is the last thing that I wrote in my journal from my trip to Guatemala last summer. I went to Hope of Life in Zacapa, Guatemala for a week with my youth group in 2013. The experience was overwhelming for me, being that I had never been to a third world country. I fell in love with the people there; they are the happiest people that I have ever met. These people had nothing, but the smiles on their faces made it seem like they had everything.
               At this point in my life my relationship with The Lord was struggling. The only time that I would talk to The Lord was when I was in desperate need for help. I had not been faithful or obedient at all to him in the last two years. I was hoping that this trip to Zacapa would bring me closer to him which meant that I had to open my eyes and ears to him again. I did not realize how much of an impact The Lord would make on me and my life during that week on the mission field.
               When I left Zacapa I knew that I wanted to go back but did not know the possibilities of it being anytime soon because of the money and plans for the following summer. I knew that I was going home with a new heart for life, people, and serving, but I really did not know if I was ever going to make it back to Guatemala or not.
                I moved back into college a week after the mission trip and I became very homesick but not for my home in Harrisonburg, Virginia. I was homesick for my home in Guatemala. It is normal to feel like that when you come back from any trip though so I brushed the feeling off not thinking too much about it. When I got this feeling of emptiness I prayed and first asked The Lord to take away that feeling and then thanked him for the experience that I had.
                  He did not take the feeling away though. It traveled with me like an extremely heavy burden. So many times in the last two years I had been getting obvious signs from the Lord and each time I did, I walked away from them completely ignoring God. This sign that he put right in front of my face was so much different than the rest though. The Lord would not let me ignore Him this time. It was almost like he led me to a fork in the road. One path was my own and one path was his but mine was blocked off. The only way I could choose was His and He refused to let me take my own this time.
                 The following weeks were when I started to make leaps of faith and learn how to obey The Lord again. I like to use the saying 'out with the old, in with the new' because that is basically how it was. I remember walking back to my dorm after class one particular day and pulling out my laptop to look at pictures from Guatemala. I had just made a huge decision in my life and I felt like looking back at those pictures would lift my spirits. Every single time I saw those beautiful smiles on those happy children my heart overflowed with joy. That is when I surrendered my heart to Him. No, it was not like the time when I was seven years old when I asked Him to come into my life and live in me. This time was completely different. I was done blatantly ignoring Him and I decided that from here on out I was going to do what He put me on this earth to do as a Christ follower.
 "Okay God, send me".
 I almost felt like God was sitting up in heaven with His feet propped up on an ottoman, reading a book of some sort, and waiting for the light bulb to go off in my head. When it finally did, I  pictured Him dropping His book and yelling out, "Finally!".
                   I knew that it was going to take a lot of prayer and change for me to be fully committed to this deal. It wasn't that I did not want to go, it was just so unrealistic for me to. The money, the faith, and most of all my trust in the Lord was going to have to come a long way in the next few months.
                  God planted something in my heart while I was there last summer. It was love. I had not known the definition of love until I witnessed it in Guatemala. I did not know what love was until I was pouring lemonade in a one liter container for a mother that had just walked over eight miles to get something to drink for her six children. I had not known what love was until I watched a little girl around the age of four with dirty feet stroking her younger sister's head while she rested on her lap because of exhaustion from walking so long (see picture below). I did not know the definition of love until I experienced it first hand. Love is not a feeling; love is an action.
                   Nine months later I am packing my bags to go back to Zacapa, Guatemala. Instead of a week, this time I am volunteering for a month. I have never been so ready for something. I cannot wait to spread God's love in that country in the next few weeks. I may not have my life figured out just yet but I know one thing is for sure, I am supposed to be in Guatemala this summer. 

Here's to 28 days in Guatemala...

Lord, send me!